|My awkward face. Not pretty.|
You may remember that I promised a laundry list of my most terrible habits at the end of my last post. Well, I might have been the slightest bit hasty in that assertion. You see, in a non-exhausted state of mind, I realized that it might make my life really awkward to truly lay out all that stuff in so public a manner...seriously. What if one of you fine blokes decide you want to date me, but then you already know all my crappy, embarrassing stuff (which actually may reverse that first statement) and I know none of yours? Awkward. Walking into the gym, I'd be super self-conscious that everyone would be thinking about my weird habits and therefore would turn red a lot and probably stutter as well. Awkward. So, here's the deal...I will happily share my crutches as they are relevant to "The Clean Year" and upcoming goals. Cool? Thanks, I appreciate it.
Last week, I hit a wall. A big one that had scary, militant gorillas on top of it. And battery acid dripping down it's sides. I wrote about the wall and the aftermath of the crash and was was surprised by how uplifted I was by both the process of putting my thoughts down on the screen as well as by the emails and calls full of encouraging words and listening ears. Thank you. Sometimes it is scary to just be real and lay all your cards on the table. It puts you in a very vulnerable, uncomfortable, even awkward spot, standing with your arms raised, not knowing if a hug or a swift punch to your gut is on it's way. It's especially difficult to be real when the "real" is just not that pretty. Often, with great risk comes great reward. This time was one of those. Sometimes, a little affirmation, empathy, and just knowing that people care is all a person needs to climb back outta that funk, ready to take on the challenge that previously beat her down. The whole journey of last week had me reflecting on how powerful these seemingly small gestures can be. Even more, how these individual actions joined together to form a straight up tsunami of love that lifted me up right out of the gloom.